Why is it so hard to be spontaneous and authentic? Is there a distortion between what you believe your true nature is and who you truly are. Part of the explanation lies in how we identify with beliefs and ideas that are quite different from the limitless reality of the world. Many have come to identify who they are and what defines them through this distorted filter.
Making the choice to live in an authentic life and allow who you really are to show up will bring you in direct contact with your shadow.
The shadow is where place all parts of ourselves that we cannot accept. Often develops in early childhood and belongs to all parts of ourselves that we’ve rejected. Unable to make sense of it you fragment or split in trying to deal with the threat. Fragmenting occurs when the child tries to deal with the rejection, criticism, shame and emotional, or abuse.
The Shadow is the Seat of our Creativity. Within it lies everything there is about us and our potential to live in an expansive way. Basically any trait or quality that was consistently rejected by our caregivers we will also reject it in order to maintain our connection with them.
Facing our shadow can come as an unwelcome encounter. We discover that denying certain qualities does not make them magically disappear. We can’t use an affirmation to make the shadow vanish. You never approach the shadow self with the goal of destroying it. It is an important and valuable aspect of who you are.
The shadow includes aspects you’re ashamed of and hide. You’re made up of dark and light and need both to be balanced and to live a good life. Whatever we see in someone else that triggers a reaction is a reflection of something inside us that needs to be owned. The shadow gains power each time we deny its existence. It grows each time we dwell on negative feelings. It wants to control your life.
Working with the Shadow
Start noticing when you blow things out of proportion. Observe judgments and triggers that come up in response to others, these can be a reflection of those aspects you’re denying.
Upset when your friend gets a promotion? Is their success threatening? Frustrated waiting in a long line at a store? Could it be entitlement surfacing? Look at those characteristics you admire in others. Who do you look up to? The people you hold in high esteem also represent qualities you have disowned.
Once you look at your hidden shadow feelings, they lose their power over you. You’ve freed your energy and life force. Where you place your awareness has become conscious and is no longer hidden. You no longer repress the shadow aspects and are able to live a conscious, authentic life.
Take a few moments of stillness. Follow the breath in and the breath out and place your focus on your heart chakra.
Hold an aspiration of offering up the qualities you’ve discovered both the dark and the light.
Ask “May all imbalances be balanced and any confusion be illuminated. May the dark and light sides be balanced and may I use the gifts hidden in shadow for the benefit of all sentient beings.”
Then sit quietly for a few minutes.
Book your Zoom or Phone session | 416 732 2661